So the truth is, I’m actually pretty conscious of my body.
This year has been a weird one for my weight – I’d gained 5 – 6kg’s a few months, and I couldn’t loose it, until I went to the doctor and realised that I had an underactive thyroid. Since I’ve been on the hormonal replacement, I’ve lost 3 kg’s, and I have another 2 until I reach my goal weight.
What I realised when I gained the weight was how fragile my self esteem actually was. 6kg’s up and a very thin pony tail later (hair loss is another side effect of an under active thyroid) and I felt horrendous. I was so sensitive. I hated having to decide what to wear because nothing looked right, and anytime that anyone mentioned that I gained some weight, I could feel my eye twitching lol!
I know that weight is a sensitive issue for a lot of women, and I completely understand – if you’re too skinny, if you’re a little plump, people judge and have something to say – as if we don’t criticize our own selves enough.
The other day, on the radio my husband had asked what the greatest personal lesson you had learnt in 2015, and I thought about it quite a bit. One of the lessons that I learnt was that I am my greatest critic, and I am so hard on myself, a lot of the time, the expectations that I have of myself are completely unrealistic. I’ve learnt that I am running my own race, racing against myself, and no one else. Comparison is really the thief of joy, and comparing myself to someone that is running a completely different race to mine is just going to frustrate me.
I’ve learnt that celebrating each others victories, and mourning each others failures and hurts together is an enriching and empowering experience. Being selfish is physically and spiritually exhausting, it is truly better to give than it is to receive.
Today, I’d like to encourage you to love yourself just the way that you are. Don’t dwell on what’s negative,wrong and fat! Celebrate what you love about yourself, and want to show off. We’re all beautiful in our own way.
Thanks for reading!