If you follow me on any of my social media platforms, by now you would know that I’ve been a little obsessed with my hair lately.
I’d come across a few “curly girls” on Instagram, and thought “wow, these girls have such beautiful curls!”, and then I remembered my curly hair, and how it terrorised me all through my adolescence. Exhibit A:
I remember feeling so conflicted growing up. I come from a mixed family; my mother; a Coloured Swazi woman , and my father; a South African Indian. I always just assumed that I was more Indian than anything because I had my fathers dark skin, but one thing was missing: the straight hair.I begged my mother to roll and blow my hair out for me one civies day, when I was in Grade 8. I begged the woman. I remember her complaining about how finished her arms were because I had a lot of hair, and it was curly as can be. She did it, and I loved it. My hair was moving and it didn’t look dry or frizzy. I was so excited for everyone at school to see – but I had the best luck in high school, I mean thee best luck. It rained that day and I had a huge ball of frizzy curls on my head from 8 o’ clock that morning. The truth is, my frizzy, curly hair made me feel ugly.
I was still hell bent on having my straight hair, and my mom was far too busy and tired to be rolling and blowing the bush out for me every week, she had her own bush to roll and blow out! Lol! I went to visit my best friend one day after school, and she had this Salton hair iron. She agreed to borrow it to me, and just like that I had straight/frizzy hair – but I was happy.
After 13 years of weekly use of the hair iron, my hair was completely heat damaged. Straight on the ends, kinky at the roots. I wanted my curls back, desperately. So I cut my hair, and you can see just how straight my ends were in this picture.
I think that I am at a place now where I am content with who I am, and I want to embrace myself fully. For a long time, I was ashamed of my mixed heritage – but embracing the way that God has made me has been a large part of my Christian walk lately. You might be thinking that its just hair, but to me, this just symbolises embracing who God has made me; physically and emotionally.
I am so blessed to have been made the way that I have had the parents that I did. I thank God for making me the way that He has. I am the way that I am on purpose, for a purpose – and so are you. Embrace yourself, you’ll thank you later 🙂